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*GUY FAWKES EDITION*
Devoted to British Politics - and how it works.
We attend a top-level Cabinet Meeting
A session in the House of Lords
Reveal the origins of the Privy Council
1. Here is a Secret Transcript of a Recent Top-
Level Cabinet Meeting:
"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen Ministers.
Firstly, I want to be clear about one thing. I do
not wish today to discuss the following tedious
subjects. Tax credits, the EU, Chinese investment,
inequality, crime growth, cyber crime, the special
relationship, the third runway, Saudi human
rights, refugees, junior doctors striking, poverty,
the disabled, the living wage, Facebook's tax
payment, tax havens, etc. No. absolutely not!
What we must focus on today is that bloody man
Corbyn! How he got to be Leader of the
Opposition, I cannot imagine."
2. A SESSION AT THE HOUSE OF LORDS:
In this Debate, the following Lords take part: Lord
Venal, Lord Sleaze, Lord Quaff, Lord Scrounge and
The following Lords are not present, having signed
in, collected their tax-free £300 and gone off to
their clubs. My Lord Bilge, My Lord Brazen, My
Lord Burble, My Lord Cheat, My Lord Doze, My
Lord Drivel, My Lord Guile, My Lord Fiddle, My
Lord Gouge, My Lord Grouch, My Lord Grab, My
Lord Grunt, My Lord Greed, My Lord Scrounge, My
Lord Snort, My Lord Slime, My Lord Smarm, My
Lord Snore, My Lord Waffle, My Lord Whinge, My
Lord Wastrel, and also My Lord Useless of Little
We do not know what the other 763 Lords are
doing at this time. You can attend the session and
P.S. The Lords have now proved their worth by
stopping Cameron robbing the poor!!!
3. THE ORIGINS OF BRITAIN'S ANCIENT PRIVY COUNCIL
The origin of Britain's famed Privy Council - of which there are today 600 exalted members, yes, 600 - goes back to 1538. The much-loved King of England at the time was Henry VIII. His two favourite pastimes were marriage and hunting. He would hunt up and down the length and breadth of England, thoroughly enjoying himself and quaffing lots of good French wine. This of course required the availability of toilet facilities - in old English - privies. A monarch cannot go behind a tree. He needs a proper privy.
In 1538, Henry abolished the monasteries of England and took their treasure. The buildings went to rack and ruin and so did the privies that each one had. As a result of his greed, Henry now had no privies available when he went hunting. A courtier saw an opportunity to gain Henry's favour, got together a few of his buddies and arranged for portable privies to accompany the King wherever he went. (The French copied the idea and called them 'porterlieus'.) King Henry was delighted with this amenity, set up 'The Privy Council' and appointed the courtier 'Lord President of the Privy Council' with an annual salary and expenses and a bonus if the king was never kept waiting for his privy. The courtier's buddies were allowed to call themselves 'Right Honourables' as they still do today.
THE BULLDOG AND THE GIANT DRAGON - A SAD POLITICAL FAIRY TALE
AND NOW - WHO GETS BRITAIN'S FOREIGN AID? Find out here:
EUROPEAN REACTIONS TO THE REFUGEES
GERMANY: They can all come! Halt! Donner und Blitzen! You did not count them properly, Fritz, you dumkopf!
HUNGARY: Quick! Place an immediate order for
barbed wire, razor wire and tear-gas!
TURKEY AND LEBANON: Come, eat, rest.
SAUDI ARABIA: What? Accept refugees? Are you
mad? They're Muslims? So?
GREAT BRITAIN: Well, um, we could take a few.
Any Old Etonians?
SOLD-OFF BRITAIN - THE GOVERNMENT'S TOP
SALESMAN QUITS.... here:
ADVICE FOR A NEW MP from an oldie - read here:
and what about: THE MP'S BUSY WORKING YEAR.
JOHN PROBLEM'S 2015
HUMAN RIGHTS CAMPAIGN
And now, for a pleasant change from politicians, we turn to bankers. And recommend:
'THE BANKERS' ASSASSIN'
An international thriller by John Problem. Reviewed as 'a rattling good read, keeps you hooked to to the end.'
On Amazon - Paperback and Kindle
For other John Problem books, please visit www.amazon.co.uk/-/e/B009EPZEQW
'The Search For Gabriella'
'The Government's Top Salesman Tells All' (A little out-of-date as it deals with Dave and Nick's time.)
'The Fearless Four and the Messenger'